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Month: August 2016

Being Home.

What does being home mean to you? What is home? I know that a lot of people connect home to a physical location. A home town. The house they grew up in and spend most of their life time living in. Maybe it’s that little apartment you can barely afford but for the first time in your life you can live by your rules and be independent. Maybe it’s the city you know best, where every street looks familiar and the neighbors greet you when you pass them. Maybe it’s a country where everyone speaks your language, where the food tastes and smells the best to you.

To be honest, I have trouble with the concept of home. It makes me feel a little uneasy, as if there is something missing. Because I don’t have a clear cut definition for it. What if you move around so much that there is not one specific location to call home? What if there are several houses you remember from your childhood? What if you have not spend more than two years in the same city in the last ten years? What if there are so little constants in your life? I think this is when things get interesting. Because you start defining home again and again. At least I feel the need to define home to myself over and over again. Oftentimes I noticed that home can be anywhere as long as there are people that you love and that love you. Your family and your friends that give you the feeling of belonging. But there is still something missing in that concept. What if family is everywhere, what if your friends are not one collective but individuals living all around the world?

So what is being home to me? It is the bed that I sleep in, it’s the calming, familiar smell when I unlock the front door. It’s the place where I know exactly where everything belongs. It is where I drive home to after a long day of work. It is where I hang up pictures on the wall. It is wherever I feel like I need to be right now. That opens up the concept of just one place in my mind. It helps me understand that home can be anywhere and everywhere. It is a feeling of peace and calm, of knowing that you are safe. It is not one singular place.

After moving around so much, I can finally say: Welcome homes. And I hope you can too.

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To my beautiful sister

Change is the only constant. And it creeps up on us, whether we notice it or not. Tomorrow, a big change is going to happen. My sister is moving away. I am beyond happy for her but I am also selfish. I don’t want her to go because I don’t want to miss my big sister. We are rarely ever physically close, yet it somehow feels different whether hundreds of kilometers separate us or a huge ocean and time difference. It has been quiet on our little Uke Blog, there is no real excuse, just life that happened and things that got busy. But with change and new challenges comes new energy, from which MoodyUkes is going to benefit. I want to start this new chapter with a couple of words directed to my beautiful sister.

To me, you can do no wrong. To me, you are the strongest, most fearless person I have met. You jump on challenging opportunities and you handle them so brilliantly. You never give yourself enough credit for that.

I want to hurt everyone who has ever dared to hurt you because you are my sister and no one gets to do that! I don’t want you to face any pain ever alone again, I want you to know I am here to listen. I know our genes and twisted brains tell us to keep it together and deal with it on our own, but you have taught me over the last month that it is okay to be hurting and it is okay to talk about it to someone. It is more than okay, it actually helps to not deal with things alone. I hope you think of me sometimes when you are facing a problem because I know you will be the first person I ask for advice. Be prepared for many calls from your little sister (probably at an unreasonable hour) to discuss my little worries. I will try to tone it down, I promise.

I know you will have an amazing time, you will meet great people and you will be okay, no matter how you feel right now. I want the people you are about to meet to know what an incredible human being they are about to get to know. And I want them to fully appreciate you because otherwise, I want my big sister back!

You will be missed here, but I know you need to be elsewhere now. I love you so much

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